Generosity

by LIT. MAJOR

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  • Full Digital Discography

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    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Not Even Crying (single), Fiction, Generosity, water in dreams, July Songs, Seeking, Trying, Other Short Stories (Abridged), and 2 more. , and , .

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1.
Generosity 03:40
Wake up for the eighth time Looking for a reason to stay down As opposed to getting out of bed And walking, walking around Could go watch a rerun Lie down on the living room couch Or I could put in my headphones Listen to whatever some dude Feels like talking about I’m looking for a little generosity From the chasm of mind I know this has been a fragile time But you don’t have to be too You don’t have to be too I just can’t stay asleep these days But in the mornings I can’t stay awake I’m trying hard to realign There are only so many pills I’ll take I’m looking to stay in my regular state For as long as my body can take I’m looking for a little generosity From the chasm of mind I know that this has been a fragile time But you don’t have to be too You don’t have to be too I don’t have to be too
2.
Mothers 04:39
I know Things get cool on the way home I like your new friend He seems very sweet Tell me again: How did you two meet? Nobody said anything about you But you took it personally You always do What do you do Always toiling and hiding Away in your room? Yes he can come over Just be sure you tell his mother I know We all in some way are in survival mode But how can I say It so you understand You don’t have to prove You are more than man You know I am always here for you That offer will stand Even though you never see it through What will you do When there’s nothing Left for us to say but the truth? Yes he can come over But be sure we get properly introduced Before the night is over I want to know his mother’s name I want to know his mother’s name I want to know his mother’s name I want to know his mother’s name I want to know his mother’s name You know, mothers have a way You know, mothers have a way You know, mothers have a way
3.
Beth 03:06
I’m not the only one Who thinks of you, Beth I try not to be bitter But it’s all I’ve got left That wellspring of anger Leaves me bereft And I’m gone I know it isn’t only me Who considers your place In the banks of our minds In pasts we can’t erase I don’t want to erase mine Because then you’d be replaced With nothing See, as much as I feel Like we wasted our time I’m not sure I’d want An alternate timeline Where we never met Where you never materialized I’m not there yet See, Beth See, Beth The answer lies inside The big question The looming of question of why, why, why See, if we wasted our time You surely wasted your own So, why, why, why? Why why why?
4.
All it took Was a hundredth Of a second Of seeing your face So woefully out of its place All I needed Was a fraction Of a moment Of time spent with you there And then everything became clear You have Some kind of magic Hold over me And it’s been active For every day Since the day we met Or has it been since We fell in love Either way, it glues me to you Either way, it glues me to you Reading you like a flier Catching both my eyes Gonna take it home with me All it took Was a sliver Of an exchange Of our eye’s gazes Spelunking down into each other’s innermost places You have Some kind of magic Hold over me And it’s been active Since the day we met Or has it been since When we fell in love Either way, it glues me to you Either way, it glues me to you Reading you like my favorite book Learning more each time Writing new notes in the margins All it took Was a hundredth Of a second Of seeing your face So woefully out of its place To know the truth
5.
Little things matter most of all These days I am on the lookout The color of the dawning sky above The window’s fog as the morning warms up I have an inky suspicion Dwelling in my belly It may be another season Before I get to feel, feel I’m so thankful that I don’t live alone ‘Cause I already feel so isolated The wind comes, adorned with children Laughing from the neighbor’s houses I have an inky suspicion Dwelling in my belly It could be another season Before I get to feel Feel something (Feel skin on skin Feel eye on eye Feel hand on hand Hands of friends of mine) You see, little things matter most of all These days I’m on the lookout I’ve got a suspicion It could be another season
6.
Always thought the haze would clear When I got to a certain age Never thought it would stick around So long into this later stage I don’t know about you But it seems I am always Looking for an answer Looking for an answer All lit up by my screen at night Maybe that’s why I can’t sleep Everything is such a mystery A secret everyone is stubborn to keep I don’t know about you But it seems I am always Looking for an answer Looking for an answer Can I find it in my mom? Can I find it in my dad? Can I find it in my work? Can I find it in my play? Can I find it in my friends? Can I find it in my man? Can I find it in myself? Will I find it some day? I don’t know about you But it seems I am always I don’t know about you But it seems I am always Always Looking for an answer I’m looking for an answer Looking for an answer Looking for an answer Looking for an answer
7.
Tough One 03:58
We were seven or eight Maybe we were nine We were staying a little late After school one time You handed me a note In utter confidence That I’d believe what you wrote And then never speak of it I broke your rule, and told her still I swallowed down that bitter pill And did what I felt was right to do She said, like I did, she’d keep it as her own But that only lasted till she grabbed the phone When faced with it you said it wasn’t true I don’t know why This memory comes through If I could do it twice I’d fight harder for you Part of me still quakes with fear That what you wrote through withheld tears Was truer than it ever should have been If I had the knowledge I have today That kids should be believed and kept safe I swear I would have helped you win I can’t believe I even Had the slightest idea What that word even meant I knew it was bad Something so bad That it could not be taken back It’s a tough truth It comes over me from time to time The ills of youth— The very thing that cut our ties You told them you lied But I fear you told the truth I think of you, and of him sometimes And I wonder what he might be getting up to…
8.
If you don’t like the weather here You better find somewhere else and disappear You’ve always been so good at that And you’ve had lesser reason in the past And the past don’t ever change It’s one of the cruelest cards played That we go over it again and again And end up right back where we started Yeah the past don’t ever change And it’s one of the cruelest cards played Think you’ve figured it out? Then please, tell me — what’s it all about? Been searching for some time And sometimes it feels like a lifetime (I can’t help myself) But the past don’t ever change It’s one of the cruelest cards played That we go over it again and again End up right back where we started Yeah the past don’t ever change And it’s one of the cruelest cards played
9.
Spring (Out) 04:14
It’s spring now And I can’t fathom how Time moves so slow But then - there it goes It’s spring now And I can’t fathom how We’ll ever get to summer Not like this, not like this It might as well be winter It might as well be snowing It might as well be a blizzard We might as well be frozen in
 We’d all be inside Hoping and dreaming For the change Of season

credits

released July 3, 2020

An album of new songs written & recorded in isolation during the spring of 2020. Pre-order now to receive 3 tracks early.

Big thanks to Luke, Daniel, and Zach, for helping out on this record, and to Community Radio Tapes for kindly putting it out on tape.

All songs written and produced by LIT. MAJOR
in the spring of 2020

Acoustic guitar, keys, percussion, mandolin, kalimba, melodica, and voice by LIT. MAJOR
Banjo on "Beth" and "Tough One" by Luke Janke
Keys, synth bass, and additional vocals on "A Hundredth of a Second" by Luke Janke
Keys and atmospheres on "Tough One" by Daniel Bernas
Bass on "The Weather Here" by Zach Sorenson

More tapes available at communityradiotapes.bandcamp.com

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LIT. MAJOR Connecticut

Sad-song-singer.

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